Safer Sex

Choosing a condom

Sometimes it can seem like the range of available condoms is bewildering. With so many sizes, shapes and thicknesses on offer, how do you know which to choose? Obviously, you are safest with a well-known brand bought from a pharmacist or brand vending machine. Always check the sell-by date and the Kitemark. Otherwise, the best plan is to try several until you find one that is comfortable for you. The preferred shape – be it straight, flared or contoured – is a matter of personal choice. Try a number of them until you find the one that is right for you.

Some people prefer a thicker condom because it may make intercourse last slightly longer. Thicker condoms usually have words such as 'ultra-strong' or 'super strong' on the packet. It was previously thought that to have anal sex you must use extra strong condoms – that isn’t the case, normal condoms are fine as long as you use enough lubricant.

Most condoms are made from latex rubber. If you think your condom reduces sensitivity or you dislike the rubbery, latex smell, try a polyurethane condom such as Durex Avanti or eZ.on. Polyurethane condoms feel thinner than they actually are, because they conduct body heat better. However, non-latex condoms are slightly more likely to break.

Using a condom – dos and don’ts

Do get your condoms from a reputable source i.e. pharmacist, health centres, organisations such as The Rainbow Project.
Do check the expiry date when you buy - the further ahead it is, the better.

Do choose a reputable brand that has the British Standard Kitemark on the pack and an expiry date of over 2 years from now. The Kitemark means the sheaths are properly tested. Expiry dates are usually 5 years after manufacture. Alternatively, choose a pack marked 'BS EN 600' - this is the European standard, which is similar to the British Standard.

Do make sure you have more than one condom, in case you damage one or it goes on wrongly.

Do be careful as you unwrap the condom – they can be damaged by teeth, fingernails and jewellery.

Do be careful not to unroll the condom inside out (except eZ.on, which can be put on either way).

Do use a water-based lubricant if needed, such as KY Gel, Durex Play, ID Glide, Liquid Silk etc.

Do put the condom on before your penis touches your partner's genitals. It is possible for infections to be passed by pre-cum leaking out of the head of the penis.

Do pull the foreskin back before rolling on the condom (obviously, this does not apply if you have been circumcised).

Do hold the condom on after you have ejaculated, otherwise it may slip off as you go soft and spill sperm.

Do remember that the more you use condoms, and the more familiar you are with them, the more comfortable and efficient you will become.

Don't feel embarrassed at the thought of buying condoms. If you really are embarrassed, get them from a slot machine in a pub/bar toilet.

Don't take any notice of a large CE mark on the pack. This is a European mark, compulsory on all condom packs after June 1998. It is to do with free trade in Europe, and is not a guarantee of quality.

Don't ever buy a pack that has no Kitemark but says it 'conforms to' or 'surpasses' British Standard 3704. This is a con. They may not have been tested at all.

Don't use a condom that is past its expiry date or which feels sticky or very dry.

Don't rely on a gimmick condom (glow-in the-dark, musical etc.) for contraception.

Don't use Vaseline, hand cream, butter, baby oil or any other oils for lubrication with latex rubber condoms.

Don't use a condom more than once; use a new one each time you have sex.

Don't flush it down the toilet after use, because it could cause a blockage. Wrap it in tissue or toilet paper and chuck it in the bin.

Talking about using condoms

It can be very awkward talking to a new partner about condoms, particularly if it is the first time you have had sex with this person. For some, it is easy to be assertive and say sex without a condom isn’t an option, whilst for others it can be more difficult. A simple way of showing you want to have protected sex without saying anything is to just take one out of your pocket or bedside drawer as things start to get heated or if you’re the active partner simply take one out yourself.

Lubrication

Always use lubricant when having anal sex with your partner. Most safer sex packs include lubricant with the condoms because the condom is more likely to break if it is not used. Lubricants should always be water based such as ID Glide, Liquid silk etc. Oil based lubricants will cause the condom to disintegrate.

Lubricants that should NOT be used with latex rubber condoms

  • Baby oil
  • Cooking oil
  • Massage oil
  • Body lotion
  • Bath oil
  • Hand cream
  • Suntan oil
  • Petroleum jelly (Vaseline)
  • Hair conditioner

The packet should tell you whether a lubricant is water-based or not. If you are unsure, ask the pharmacist or family planning clinic. Spit is not a good idea, because it dries fast and could theoretically transmit HIV or hepatitis.

Here's How:

Be sure to use a new condom before you have sex.
Squeeze the tip of the condom to remove air.

When penis is hard (before any sexual contact), place condom on tip and roll down all the way.

After ejaculating (coming) take out the penis while still hard.

Hold on to the rim of the condom so no fluids spill out.

Dispose of the condom

Be sure to use a new condom every time you have sex.